


perfect altitude

by chocoballs



Series: flying [1]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, Humor, Light Angst, M/M, Making Out, Porn with Feelings, Recreational Drug Use, Self-Indulgent, Texting, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-15
Updated: 2019-12-15
Packaged: 2021-02-24 16:07:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,650
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21800647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chocoballs/pseuds/chocoballs
Summary: "i want to kiss you~"mark tries not to shiver. he just simply stares at his best friend, as the younger urges him on by opening his arms wider. for some godforsaken reason, making out with donghyuck became a regular thing ever since mark's last year of high school. and it's been years since then. years of putting down his feelings and years of hardwork wasted, as all of it comes back up whenever donghyuck would corner him, asking for a kiss.
Relationships: Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee
Series: flying [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1570936
Comments: 26
Kudos: 369





	perfect altitude

**Author's Note:**

> * mature/sexual themes! read at your own risk •~• 
> 
> * the recreational drug use tag is only for one scene but its still there 
> 
> * very very very light dom/sub undertones so i decided not to put it in the tags but its kinda there so heres the heads up!
> 
> * kinda ~not~ proofread T____T sorry for any grammar/typographical errors! [!] finally edited some minor mistakes/typos: 02/07/20. original publishing date: 12/15/19.

"mark hyuuuuung~"

mark feels his left eye twitch, obviously annoyed at the little brat at the other side of the room, distracting him as he's working on his homework. it's not new, for all the years that he and donghyuck have been friends, he's always been the type to be a nuisance (not really) to mark, always bothering him and putting him up to things he didn't like at first. of course, at first, mark knew better than to tolerate him. but then again, it's not like mark can do anything about it, he likes donghyuck's company. he'd rather endure it than have nothing at all.

and today is no different. donghyuck arrived at their shared room just not long ago, already whining about how hard the day has been. donghyuck flopped himself on his bed, shucking his shoes off and immediately started making little noises to catch mark's attention.

"maaaaaark." donghyuck tries once again.

mark decides to spare him a glance, quickly regretting it as he sees donghyuck's face light up with mischief. he rolls his eyes, turning back to his laptop. donghyuck grunts even louder.

"maaaaaark, mark, mark, mark, mark~" he isn't just stopping. mark glares at him.

"what?"

"c'mere." donghyuck pouts, opening his arms. _oh_. mark can already tell what he's trying to do.

"no."

"aw, don't be like that. c'mon, please? just for a little bit?" _no_. mark wants to say no, his mind his telling him to say no but it's been a while since he last let himself fall into donghyuck's lurring trap.

"why?" mark groans and drags, the million dollar question that donghyuck's been waiting for. he can tell just by looking at the satisfied grin adorning his face.

"i want to kiss you~"

mark tries not to shiver. he just simply stares at his best friend, as the younger urges him on by opening his arms wider. for some godforsaken reason, making out with donghyuck became a regular thing ever since mark's last year of high school. and it's been years since then. he's on his third year of college now, donghyuck on his second. years of putting down his feelings and years of hardwork wasted, as all of it comes back up whenever donghyuck would corner him, asking for a kiss.

he doesn't know what changed, doesn't know _why_ donghyuck first kissed him in the front of mark's house after he just finished a crying session because apparently, he's going to miss mark when he graduates. he always thought, they would talk about it afterwards but it never came. their second kiss happened when mark came back from his second week of college, tired and asking for his best friend to comfort him. a simple massage would do. that was what he was expecting. not a pair of full lips that he came to miss so much, but it happened anyway. and just like the first time, they never talked about it the next day.

when donghyuck kissed him the third time, the fourth time, the fifth, mark lost track of how many kisses it has been. it became almost like a routine. all it takes are a few words and mark, the fool he is, comes right back to him. maybe it's because mark doesn't bring it up that made donghyuck think it was okay. it _was_ okay, at first. mark didn't mind at all, he was merely crushing on donghyuck and kissing him was a bonus. but as the feelings grew stronger, his heart ached harder. and that's what mark hates about all of this, the unsaid feelings, the missed confrontation and confession. but it's okay, he tells himself. it's donghyuck, anyway.

mark sighs, closing his laptop, already hearing the excited squeels coming from his best friend. he pretends to dread it, slowly lifting himself from his bed and walking towards donghyuck's. he glares at him for a few seconds, before donghyuck reaches for the back of his neck and pulls him down for the long awaited kiss.

maybe it's been two weeks? two weeks since he last kissed mark. far too long, at least in mark's own humble opinion. and as much as he hates to admit it, he missed the feeling of donghyuck's lips against his. he always does. 

mark sighs, hands coming up to cup donghyuck's cheeks, stroking the soft skin there. donghyuck pulls back for a second, staring right into mark's eyes, mark's soul.

mark narrows his eyes. "what?"

"nothing," donghyuck giggles, pulling him closer so they're both laying on top of the bed. "you're so cute."

mark hums, one hand cupping donghyuck's cheek, the other on his shoulder. "how was your day?"

"boring, as always." donghyuck juts his bottom lip out, basking underneath mark's warmth. "missed you."

"no, you didn't." mark rolls his eyes.

"hey! i did!" donghyuck whines, pushing mark back by his shoulders to straddle him. mark squeeks embarrassingly, surprised at the suddenness. donghyuck noses at mark's neck, breathing in his scent, chuckling at how mark's breath hitched. "i did. i missed you."

"okay, okay, calm down." mark pushes him away softly, sighing.

"kiss me."

mark doesn't need to be told twice. once he's regained composure, he pulls donghyuck back, connecting their lips for another kiss. donghyuck's hands snake up to mark's hair, pulling at the strands. mark groans, licking into donghyuck's mouth, admittedly making donghyuck shiver. mark grabs donghyuck's hands, to stop him from pulling at his quite sensitive hair, and makes him cup mark's face. donghyuck smiles at the tenderness, planting a quick kiss on mark's lips, and another, and another, before pulling away.

mark tries not to stare at the redness of donghyuck's lips, hand wiping at his mouth.

"god, you're so cute," donghyuck pinches mark's pinkish cheeks. "you always get so blushy, whenever we kiss."

"i don't think that's a word."

donghyuck makes a sound at the back of his throat, eyes looking down at mark's lips yet once again. before donghyuck can move, mark beats him to it, kissing him, even harder. he knows he took donghyuck by surprise, considering the stunned glint in his eyes. donghyuck kisses back anyway, wrapping his arms around mark's neck, and if mark didn't know any better, he wouldn't have noticed donghyuck grinding in his lap. but he does. and it's doing nothing for his reddening cheeks.

"mark," donghyuck grunts, trailing the softest of kisses down mark's neck. he sucks at a particularly sensitive spot, making mark moan by surprise. donghyuck snorts, lips travelling down his jaw and on mark's mouth again. mark tries his best not to whimper. "mark, mark, mark..."

"fuck, donghyuck..."

mark's head is spinning, unable to focus at everything that's happening at the moment. he doesn't realize donghyuck was off him, until he hears jaemin's shrill voice yell in a scandalized tone. "lock your doors!"

donghyuck laughs mockingly, making kissy faces at jaemin.

"wipe your mouths, ugh, disgusting." jaemin fake gags, rolling his eyes.

mark flushes, using his shirt to wipe at his mouth as donghyuck does the same.

"anyway, there's a party a few blocks from here. and i'm not accepting a 'no' so get dressed. don't keep us waiting, we'll be outside," jaemin huffs. "and cover your hickey, mark." and with that, he slams the door shut.

mark's eyes widen at jaemin's words. "donghyuck!"

"i'm sorry!" donghyuck laughs and mark knows he's really not. "here, i have a sweater that'll cover that."

mark snatches the sweater from donghyuck's hands, glaring at him as he does so. the moment he's done, donghyuck drops down for another quick kiss.

"let me get changed first."

mark scoffs, nodding his head. _fuck my life._  
  


_**< heterophobes, 9 people > ** _

_128 unread messages..._

**xuxi 5:56 AM** : ANYONE WANT TO SEE VIDEOS FROM LAST NIGHT

 **jaemin 5:58 AM** : U HAVE VIDEOS

 **xuxi 5:58 AM:** HELL YEAH I DO

 **renjun 5:59 AM** : oh god

 **jeno 5:59 AM:** anything but mark and hyuck....

 **xuxi 5:59 AM:** dw ill save the best for last

 **yangyang 6:00 AM** : i dont think thats what he meant

 **xuxi 6:00 AM:** ANYWAY  
 **xuxi 6:04 AM:** video1.mp4

 **xiaojun 6:04 AM:** was that hendery dancing on the table

 **hendery 6:04 AM** : HELL YEAH IT WAS  
 **hendery 6:04 AM** : last night was so fun we should do it again

 **xuxi 6:06 AM:** video2.mp4

 **yangyang 6:06 AM** : HAHAHAHAHA @xiaojun

 **xiaojun 6:08 AM:** in my defense i was drunk

 **yangyang 6:08 AM:** i was drunk too and i wasnt making out with a spoon was i

 **xiaojun 6:09 AM** : SHUT UP

 **xuxi 6:09 AM** : video3.mp4

 **renjun 6:10 AM:** this is why Any of us arent allowed to drink at all

 **xuxi 6:10 AM** : HEY SHHHH u looked cute

 **renjun 6:10 AM:** i know <3ur cuter

 **xuxi 6:10 AM** : <3

 **yangyang 6:11 AM:** gross

 **hyuck 6:14 AM:** good morning?? i have a fucking hangover  
 **hyuck 6:14 AM** : what happened why was i mentioned  
 **hyuck 6:14 AM:** hey wdym not me and mark >:(

 **xiaojun 6:14 AM:** i dont think anybody wants to see the video of u two making out on a pingpong table

 **hendery 6:14 AM:** beerpong gone wild hahahaha

 **xiaojun 6:15 AM** : pls never say that again

 **hyuck 6:15 AM:** omg xuxi send it to me

 **xuxi 6:17 AM** : video8.mp4

 **jeno 6:18 AM:** EWWWW

 **jaemin 6:18 AM:** EWWWW  
 **jaemin 6:18 AM:** WHYD U SEND IT HERE

 **hyuck 6:19 AM:** SHUT UP LIKE U TWO WERE ANY BETTER  
 **hyuck 6:19 AM:** damn thats kinda hot

 **renjun 6:19 AM:** for the love of god pls keep it in ur pants hyuck

 **hyuck 6:21 AM** : no  
 **hyuck 6:21 AM:** HEY LOOK @mark we're hot

mark stops reading there, feeling his cheeks heat up. why does yukhei have a video of them making out? and on a pingpong table, of all places? god, he's such an idiot when he's wasted. he runs his hands through his hair, already sensing the headache forming. he was pretty gone last night, and being with donghyuck wasn't any better. _now_ almost everybody in their batch, saw him going at donghyuck's mouth like a suckerfish, and not to mention yukhei has a video of all of it.

just as he was about to tuck himself under his covers and go back to sleep, the door swings open and reveals donghyuck holding a paper bag on one hand. "mark! you're awake! did you see the videos xuxi sent?"

"good morning to you too, hyuck." mark rolls his eyes, watching as the younger puts down the stuff he bought on their table.

donghyuck snorts, walking closer. "good morning, markie. had fun last night? i bought painkillers. i woke up with a bloody headache, and i figured you would too so i bought aspirin. and breakfast!" he sits atop mark's bed, cupping his cheek.

mark sighs deeply, leaning into the touch. "thank you."

"you're welcome! now get your ass out of bed and take these, hm?" donghyuck grins, patting mark's cheek softly.

mark tries not to blush, as he sits up and reaches for the aspirin. donghyuck hands him a glass of water and gulps down the painkiller. "i saw the messages. and the video. i can't believe you."

"what? you have to admit, we were pretty hot." donghyuck giggles innocently as if the topic wasn't about them making out for the whole world to see. "if you're worried about it spreading or something, i already told xuxi not to post it anywhere. so chill, okay?"

"okay," mark sighs. "okay, good. thank you." but truth be told, he doesn't really mind the video. in fact, he wouldn't care at all if it spread. at least the fuckers trying to hit on donghyuck all the time would know that he's already kissing someone else at night. if it _does_ go out, he'd just have to live the embarrassment down.

"did... did anything else happen later that night?" mark asks.

donghyuck looks up, meeting his eyes then looks at the ceiling, trying to remember. "hm? i don't think so? are you like, asking if we did anything else other than kissing?"

"y-yeah..." mark coughs, looking away.

"no, we didn't. as far as i remember, xiaojun hyung dragged us back to his car and drove us here." donghyuck smiles, cooing at the way mark lets out the breath he's been holding. "you're so cute. don't worry, markie. no matter how much i'm drunk, i would never do anything you're uncomfortable with."

"oh," mark musters. "y-yeah, me... me too."

"good." donghyuck smirks, leaning closer. " _but_ if you want anything from me, you can just ask, you know?"

mark yelps, shoving donghyuck's face away as the brat laughs his has off. "i'm kidding!"

"you're unbelievable." mark rolls his eyes. "go away, you have classes! i'm going to eat. peacefully. without you bothering me."

"fine fine," donghyuck sighs, hovering close to kiss mark's forehead ever so gently. "i'll get going now! bye, hyung! call me if you need me, 'kay?"

mark nods once, waving and giving donghyuck a soft smile before digging in. "love you!" he hears from outside, as donghyuck shuts the door.

"fuck off!" mark yells back, despite the redness on his cheeks.  
  
  


donghyuck arrives later that afternoon, feeling spent but going straight to mark anyway.

"you know, i've been thinking..." hyuck peers down at the boy on his lap, stroking his hair softly. mark has been reading a book for the past thirty minutes ever since donghyuck entered their room and as donghyuck suggested, he'll read better if he's lying down. which wasn't true, considering how mark's head is spinning, but he stopped reading ever since donghyuck situated him on his lap anyway.

"that's a first." mark mutters, earning a sharp tug. "ow!"

"shhh, listen to me."

"fine, what."

"i really like your kisses."

mark looks up at him, meeting donghyuck's eyes. "is that so?"

"yeah."

mark closes his eyes for a good second before lifting his head off donghyuck's lap to face the younger, who was already smirking at him.

"hm, what if i say _i_ don't?" mark's hands are already pulling donghyuck closer and closer, betraying his words.

"then i'd say you're lying." donghyuck pulls mark's hands and puts them on his shoulders, before slamming their lips for a sloppy, hard kiss. mark's first course of action, was to sit in donghyuck's lap and the younger, of course, welcomes him with open arms. (open legs). mark whimpers when he feels donghyuck lick inside his mouth, feeling sensitive all over, skin tingling, heart racing.

donghyuck pulls back, to take mark's sweater off. but mark's already grabbing donghyuck in for another kiss, hissing when he tried creating some sort of friction between them to relieve his hard on. donghyuck grips his thighs harshly, mouth sucking a new hickey on mark's chest. mark pulls at his hair, moaning when donghyuck mouths at his exposed nipple.

"hyuck..." mark exhales, head tipping back.

"hyung, i want to fuck you."

mark's breath hitches, surprised. they've never got to that before. all they've done until now was make out, and that's it. grind on each other, sure. but not, this far. whenever mark encounters a problem down there, he would just take care of it himself inside their bathroom. never did they... try to do something further.

"i..."

"we don't have to, if you don't wanna, of course." donghyuck's voice was raspy, as he draws circles on mark's waist.

"n-no, i... i want to," mark pouts, already feeling himself drop to a softer headspace. "hm, hyuckie, i wanna..."

"yeah?" donghyuck grins, reaching for a small bottle of lube under his pillow.

mark nods cutely, pouting and grinding harder against donghyuck, whimpering quietly as the younger takes his own shirt off. "c'mere baby, let me fuck you."  
  
  


mark wakes up to the scent of him.

and the feeling of donghyuck's chest, pressed against his. the younger's arms are wrapped nicely around mark's frame, as he sleeps soundly. memories from last night suddenly comes flooding his mind and he can't help but feel embarrassed, at least. last night was... undoubtedly, something. he just had sex with his best friend, which was, admittedly, an amazing experience. donghyuck was very nice to take care of him afterwards as well, but he knows, that was a given since donghyuck isn't an asshole to just fuck and leave, anyway. he feels absolutely giddy, warmth blossoming in his chest.

mark nuzzles his face into the crook of donghyuck's neck, which seems to wake the other up. he feels the hands on his waist disappear and move itself to the back of mark's head, stroking his hair, a pair of lips pressing against his forehead. "morning."

"hm, morning."

"had fun last night?"

mark squints, looking up at the younger just to see him already grinning down at him with that familiar undeniably hot smirk of his. "why are you even asking that?"

"so was i good?"

 _amazing_. "was okay."

mark knows donghyuck knows he's lying through his teeth, which results with him getting a soft pat in his butt. donghyuck chuckles, "i think i'm better than anyone you've had before."

"are you now?" mark sasses, raising an eyebrow.

"of course," donghyuck replies haughtily, puffing his chest out. "is anyone _really_ better than lee donghyuck?"

 _no one, of course. you're the best._ "i think i could name a few people."

"shut up," donghyuck snorts, pressing their foreheads together in a way that makes mark's heart fly out of his chest. "last night was amazing, if you ask me."

"i...y-yeah..." mark trails dumbly. "yeah, i-it was."

donghyuck smiles against his skin, and just stays there. mark relaxes in his arms, letting himself be cuddled. they don't say anything for a while, giving mark time to process everything that happened last night. donghyuck starts absentmindedly kissing his face, arms snaking around his waist, trailing down the bare skin, eventually squeezing mark's butt. mark yips, pinching donghyuck's arm. donghyuck laughs, and it's the same laugh he came to love, and mark is totally lovestruck.

"mark?" donghyuck calls when his laughter dies down.

"yeah?"

"you're not going to ignore me after last night, are you?"

"of course not." mark kisses his nose. "i was the one who asked for it anyway."

donghyuck laughs breathily. "you're so cute."

"shut up."

donghyuck sits up, hovers over him and starts planting soft kisses all over mark once again, as the older grunts, feigning annoyance but doing nothing to stop him. mark puts his hands on the sides of donghyuck's head, before kissing him full on the lips, smiling at the feeling of warmth that is donghyuck.  
  
  


**mark 7:04 AM:** holy shit  
 **mark 7:04 AM:** we fucked

 **renjun 7:04 AM:** WHAT

 **mark 7:05 AM:** WE FUCKED OH MY GOD

 **renjun 7:05 AM** : MARK OMG  
 **renjun 7:05 AM:** who topped

 **mark 7:05 AM:** he did  
 **mark 7:06 AM** : god hes so hot  
 **mark 7:06 AM:** hes so amazing in bed  
 **mark 7:06 AM:** i wouldve came so fast if i didnt hold it in

 **renjun 7:08 AM** : EW MARK TMI  
 **renjun 7:08 AM:** UR DISGUSTING

 **mark 7:08 AM** : ur acting as if u didnt give me specific explanations when u and xuxi first had sex

 **renjun 7:09 AM:** ok....  
 **renjun 7:09 AM** : so are u going to tell him.  
 **renjun 7:09 AM** : about ur f**lings

 **mark 7:09 AM:** i dont think so

 **renjun 7:09 AM** : mark :(

 **mark 7:09 AM** : its fine  
 **mark 7:10 AM:** im fine  
 **mark 7:10 AM** : god i texted u to rant about his dick now youre just making me sad

 **renjun 7:10 AM** : HHHHHHH FINE im sorry  
 **renjun 7:11 AM:** ....go on  
  


after that, mark can't seem to take his mind off of it. the way donghyuck filled him up so good, how hot he was on top of mark, grunting praise against his skin and blemishing the canvas that is mark's neck, how he trailed his lips down mark's body praising him, telling him how good he was. it only makes mark want him more.

but mark soon realizes that jerking off or stuffing three fingers deep his ass isn't going to do anything about his wet dreams, unless donghyuck fucks him again.

the amount of obscenely dirty dreams and thoughts mark had been having is not pretty, at all. sometimes, he hates himself for it but most of the time he's too horny to even notice how low getting hard over donghyuck sucking on a popsicle is.

it's been almost two weeks after that night, nothing much changed in their dynamic except maybe for the fact that donghyuck became more... territorial. it could be mark over exaggerating it but over the course of two weeks, mark noticed the little changes - like how donghyuck grabs him by the waist in front of their friends as if he's saying something mark can't place a finger on, or just last night, when they were out clubbing, the way donghyuck kissed him hard in a room full of people, just after he finds out someone bought mark a drink.

sometimes, mark thinks... maybe donghyuck _does_ reciprocate his feelings. but that tiny, ugly monster inside of him says otherwise - and that's more than enough to make him feel like he's just a friend and nothing more. he wants to tell himself, it's nothing to be sad about. he's young and there are lots of other people he'll come to meet one day. but then again, he's been in love with that idiot for how many years now and he can't just bring himself to surrender his heart to someone else. maybe it's a curse? mark isn't really sure.

when he opens the door to their room, he sees that donghyuck was already there - which was weird, because he always gets there before donghyuck does. but even before mark gets to question it, donghyuck's already walking towards him, slamming the door (and making sure to lock) as he pushes mark against it.

"hyuck?"

donghyuck says nothing, only taking mark's backpack off him, along with his jacket. he mouths at mark's jaw, making the other whimper at the action. "h-hyuckie..."

mark feels tingly, _horny_. god, he's too far gone, he gets hard at the simplest things. he wasn't like this before, maybe it's the effect of having donghyuck's cock inside him. he brings his hands up donghyuck's shoulders, ready to submit, when donghyuck exhales through his nose and drops his head down mark's shoulder.

"hyuck?"

"sorry." donghyuck says. _huh_?

"hyuck? what's wrong?"

"s'nothing... just," donghyuck looks at him, pouting. god, mark wants to kiss him so bad. "fuck, sorry for suddenly doing that. i didn't ask. did i make you uncomfortable? sorry."

mark stares at him for a good minute, taking in the way a pinkish blush is riding high off donghyuck's cheeks. mark chuckles, cupping mark's cheeks. "hyuckie, it's okay, i didn't mind."

"you didn't?" donghyuck etches his eyebrows. "ah, but still, it was wrong of me to just go to you like _that_. god, i'm probably coming off as too horny, am i?"

"what?" mark laughs cheekily. "of course not. why, were you about to fuck me against the wall or something?"

"well, i _wouldn't_ if you didn't want to, of course. i would always ask you first, you know." donghyuck lifts his face to look up at mark as he pouts.

mark says nothing, just holds donghyuck's hands and guides them to take mark's shirt off. donghyuck opens his mouth, to say something, but mark cuts him off with a finger to his lips. donghyuck quiets down and lets mark lead the way, anticipating, wating for mark's next move. mark does the courtesy of taking donghyuck's shirt off, kissing from his collarbones down to his exposed chest, earning a groan from the younger.

mark thinks he's going to pass out, he's been thinking about this since the day it first happened. his heart is hammering and he knows donghyuck can hear, can _feel_ the way it's beating loudly against his. mark palms at donghyuck's crotch, smiling at the way the other leans into his touch, glaring him down as if he's ready to devour. donghyuck grips his hips, just as hard as he did the first time, and waits patiently. "fuck me." mark whispers into his ear, before turning around to lean against the wall, waiting for donghyuck to take him.  
  
  
  


**mark 2:13 AM:** FUCK

 **renjun 2:13 AM:** what now

 **mark 2:13 AM:** WE FUCKED AGAIN

 **renjun 2:13 AM:** i know mark i have walls

 **mark 2:15 AM:** SHUT UP IT WAS SO AMAZING  
 **mark 2:15 AM:** HE FUCKEDME AGAONST THE DOOR

 **renjun 2:15 AM:** MARK PLEASE SHUT THE FUCK UP

 **mark 2:15 AM:** NO  
 **mark 2:16 AM:** god his dick is heavenly

 **renjun 2:16 AM:** i dont think thats the term u should be using  
 **renjun 2:16 AM:** what happened AFTER

 **mark 2:16 AM** : oh u dont want to hear details about how i took him raw

 **renjun 2:18 AM:** IM BLOCKING YOU

 **mark 2:18 AM** : I WAS KIDDING  
 **mark 2:18 AM:** i shall not go further into detail but i wasnt lying about him rawing me

 **renjun 2:18 AM:** ....

 **mark 2:18 AM** : OK ANYWAY  
 **mark 2:19 AM** : just normal stuff. u know  
 **mark 2:19 AM** : took care of me and everything :(  
 **mark 2:19 AM:** even invited me for dinner :(

 **renjun 2:19 AM:** well duh  
 **renjun 2:20 AM** : he cant just leave after fucking you  
 **renjun 2:20 AM** : ill kick him if he does

 **mark 2:20 AM** : hhhhh thanks injun :(

 **renjun 2:20 AM:** <3 now go have fun  
 **renjun 2:21 AM:** ill be here if u need me

 **mark 2:22 AM:** thank u <3

"who're you texting?"

mark looks up from his phone to see donghyuck looking at him with curiosity burning in his eyes. "just renjun."

they're at a 24-hour opened samgyupssal store, after donghyuck convinced him he's the one paying this time. even if he wouldn't, mark would've said yes, anyway.

"hm, i see." donghyuck mumbles, before giving mark a small smile. "hyung, i don't think we've ever properly talked about what happened ever since two weeks ago."

has he been counting too?

"i just wanted to say," donghyuck continues. "thanks for trusting me enough to do this with you. i don't think i'd ever want to do it with anybody else, to be honest, 'cause you know... they're not you." he chuckles nervously.

"'course i trust you." mark places his hand on top of donghyuck's, who takes it with no hesitation. "you're my best friend, and it's been really good, honestly. but..."

"but?"

"what does that make us?" mark tries to search donghyuck's eyes but his expression is unreadable, so mark continues, not wanting to make anything between them awkward. not when he's come ths far. "fuck buddies?" he tries to laugh for added effect.

donghyuck chuckles. "sure, if that's what you want."

mark hums, noncommittally, before the waitress comes and puts their meals down in front of them. mark tries not to think about it too much, they're friends. mark will take it, as long as he'll have donghyuck stay by his side longer.  
  


_**< heterophobes, 9 people > ** _

**yangyang 3:16 AM** : what were mark hyung and hyuck doing at a samgyup store at 2 in the morning

 **hyuck 3:18 AM:** none of ur business  
 **hyuck 3:18 AM** : howd u spot us weirdo

 **yangyang 3:18 AM** : just walking by  
 **yangyang 3:18 AM** : then saw u feeding mark hyung  
 **yangyang 3:18 AM** : dy n ty hyung r going to skin u alive

 **hyuck 3:19 AM** : so

 **hendery 3:20 AM:** ewww young love

 **hyuck 3:22 AM:** ok boomer

 **hendery 3:23 AM** : SHUT UP

 **renjun 3:23 AM:** its 3 in the fucking morning stop flooding my phone

 **xuxi 3:23 AM:** just mute the gc baby :(

 **renjun 3:24 AM** : okay :(

 **xuxi 3:24 AM** : goodnight <3 sweet dreams, love u

 **renjun 3:24 AM** : love u too <3 go to sleep u big baby

 **xiaojun 3:26 AM:** dont u all have private messages to do this at

 **xuxi 3:26 AM:** just showing off my one true love<3

 **hendery 3:26 AM** : GROSSSS  
 **hendery 3:26 AM** : @xiaojun love me too

 **xiaojun 3:27 AM:** no

 **hyuck 3:27 AM:** why are u all even awake

 **j** **eno** **3:27 AM:** why are You awake

 **hyuck 3:29 AM:** its a friday night am i not allowed to  
 **hyuck 3:29 AM** : wait its saturday now technically

 **jaemin 3:30 AM** : hyuck where are u

 **hyuck 3:30 AM:** dorms  
 **hyuck 3:30 AM:** : we came back almost 30 minutes ago

 **jaemin 3:30 AM:** ....okay  
 **jaemin 3:30 AM:** : ur so weird, taking mark out on a date at 2am what are u

 **hyuck 3:30 AM** : i didnt judge u when u took jeno out for window shopping as ur first date

 **jaemin 3:32 AM:** IT WASNT WINDOW SHOPPING

 **hyuck 3:32 AM** : ok sure  
 **hyuck 3:32 AM** : im going to sleep my dick is tired from being in marks ass all night

 **mark 3:33 AM:** DONGHYUCK

 **jaemin 3:34 AM** : DONGHYUCK

 **xiaojun 3:34 AM:** DONGHYUCK

 **hendery 3:34 AM** : DONGHYUCK

 **jaemin 3:34 AM:** DONT BE GROSS IN THE GC  
 **jaemin 3:35 AM:** im kicking u out

 **hyuck 3:35 AM** : DONT  
 **hyuck 3:35 AM** : im going to sleep now  
 **hyuck 3:36 AM** : gn u fucking losers  
 **hyuck 3:36 AM** : except for mark ur not a loser  
 **hyuck 3:36 AM** : wait u kinda are

 **xiaojun 3:36 AM:** just sleep dumbass

"i'm a loser?" mark pouts up at donghyuck, who immediately captures his mouth for a kiss. they're in mark's bed, cuddling as always, after coming back from their little trip to the store. mark is dead tired but when he has a flirty donghyuck laying on his stomach, he thinks he can stay awake for a few more minutes.

mark tries not to think about the fact that everyone in their groupchat believed they were on a date, and donghyuck, surprisingly acknowledging it. he shuns the thought away, when he feels donghyuck's lips ghost around his cheek.

donghyuck smiles against him. "yeah, you're a loser. you think i didn't forget that god awful outfit you were at prom night in high school?"

"hey! we were in high school!" mark glares at him. "besides, it's not like you were any better. you wore pyjamas to prom, i at least had the decency to dress up."

"guess i'm also a loser, then." donghyuck slides his hands against mark's waist, lays his head on top of mark's chest. mark tries to stifle the giggle, but fails when donghyuck nuzzles his face, tickling mark. "god, how are you so cute all the time?"

"s-shut up," mark hides his face behind his hands as if that's going to do anything for his poor heart. "i should b-be asking you that..."

"see? so cute!" donghyuck tries to take mark's hands away to stare at him fully but mark looks away. he doesn't think he can go long with donghyuck looking at him like _that_. "like what?"

 _oh_. he said it out loud, mark, you dumbass.

"just... you know," mark exhales through his nose, trying to calm the beating of his chest. "like you're going to- mmf!"

donghyuck cuts him off with an obnoxiously loud, exaggerated kiss on the lips. mark whines, high in his chest, attempting to push donghyuck away, giggling as he does so. "donghyuck, you asshole."

"what?" donghyuck chuckles, taking mark's hands in his.

"stop playing, idiot. we should go sleep," mark tells him, eyes already drooping downwards. donghyuck coos at the sight, before giving him a gentle kiss on the forehead.

"okay, yeah, you're right." donghyuck smiles, a warm smile that mark knows and is sure of, that's only reserved for him. he lays on the bed with his arms spread and mark takes off to make his way for his own bed as well.

mark looks at donghyuck's puzzled expression and mirrors it, asking, "what?"

"can't you just-" donghyuck cuts himself off, before stifling a quiet chuckle. he waves a hand to dismiss it. "ah, nothing, goodnight hyung."

mark smiles back. "okay, goodnight, hyuck."

"sweet dreams."

"you too."

mark flops himself on his bed and immediately turns his head to look at donghyuck. donghyuck mouths something to him but with the room's dim lighting of the room, he couldn't really make out the stuff he's saying. "what?"

donghyuck squeeks. "nothing! night night, hyung."

"goodnight..." mark says once again, already drifting off to his sleep. and when donghyuck comes towards him, planting one last kiss on his forehead, he convinces himself it was a dream.  
  


"look what i have~" donghyuck purrs once he bursts through the door, a big grin on his face. he locks the door tightly and mark tilts his head to the side in confusion. 

donghyuck makes his way to his bed and pats the soft cushion, gesturing mark to sit next to him. mark makes his way towards donghyuck and immediately gets pulled down for a kiss on the cheek. "missed you." 

mark yelps, surprised at the sudden action and before he can even say it back it, donghyuck is off him and pulling something out from his backpack to lay it flat on the bed. 

"you didn't." mark gasps, eyes widening once he sees what donghyuck had. 

donghyuck laughs. "oh, yes i definitely did. johnny hyung had some, how can i resist?" 

donghyuck brought weed. into their room. "donghyuck! you do know that's going to leave a smell..." 

"i'll clean it up," donghyuck shrugs it off, smiling widely. "come on, come on!" 

"are you serious?"

"yes, yes i am." 

mark sighs in defeat and picks the blunt up, bringing it between his lips with donghyuck doing the same. donghyuck roasts the end and inhales when the smoke finally comes out. he coughs for a bit but then giggles away. mark rolls his eyes and inhales his, feeling the smoke enter his lungs and exhales, all of it collecting inside the room. 

"gross, it smells like weed already." mark comments, squinting. 

donghyuck chuckles. "s'kay..." 

"ugh, are you high already?" mark grunts in disbelief watching donghyuck give him a lopsided smile. 

mark takes another hit and another, and another, then another until he can feel himself fly off and be carried into a whole new dimension. he starts giggling, when donghyuck tries to hug him, little bursts of laughter puncturing out. 

"markie, you stink." donghyuck pouts, poking mark's cheek softly. 

"you do too, dummy." mark replies, swatting donghyuck's finger away. 

"dummy," donghyuck repeats, chuckling but even if he's high off his ass, mark can sense it was a bit lifeless. "you're right. markie, i feel dumb..." 

"what d'you mean?" 

"just... i dunno, school is really milking my brain out. i feel like i can't do anything 'nymore. d'you feel like that too?" 

"yeah..." mark nods, understanding. "'course. school sucks ass. makes me want to cry sometimes." 

"uh huh," donghyuck sighs. "i just want to run away, y'know? obviously, i can't do it but... i don't know, it just, yeah, i don't know... hey, that cloud looks like a little bird." 

"we're inside the room, idiot." mark starts bursting into fits of laughter, slapping donghyuck's chest playfully. 

"oh." donghyuck begins to laugh as well, echoes resonating around the room. 

and then silence. donghyuck is still smoking and mark is just staring blankly at the painted walls, looking deep in thought. there's a dull throbbing in his head already and he groans in annoyance. 

"i feel numb, fuck." mark brings his fingers up to massage at his temple. 

donghyuck snickers at him before leaning closer to press a quick kiss on mark's lips. when donghyuck pulls back, mark grabs him by the nape to kiss him harder. they reek of marijuana but really, mark could care any less. donghyuck puts his blunt down, shuffling about to get into mark's lap. mark lifts him by the waist and pulls him closer, puffs of hot air coming out his mouth. 

donghyuck darts his tongue out, tasting mark's lips and groaning softly at the feeling. his hands are on mark's hair while mark's are roaming around donghyuck's body underneath his shirt. mark takes a deep breath before pulling away, chuckling. 

"what?" 

"nothing, you're adorable." 

"shut up." donghyuck rolls his eyes and tries to get his mouth on mark's neck but mark stops him.

donghyuck whines, impatient as he watches mark slot the blunt between his lips and inhale. mark is watching him with hooded eyes, bringing him closer until their lips are touching and exhales, right into donghyuck's mouth. 

"did you just fucking... shotgun me?" donghyuck laughs, cheeks pink. 

mark only hums before smirking, and putting his mouth back on the younger. 

"you're so fucking hot." donghyuck sighs, pulling mark's shirt up and taking it off, sucking a new bruise to add to mark's collection of purple patches. 

days pass and academic wise, mark is the one who's starting to feel absolutely drained. with an engineering course, he isn't quite sure if he would make it out from hell alive. he feels his insides burning and his stomach churning in the worst way possible and it takes all his strength not to bawl his eyes out the moment he comes home from school.

the fact that he's recently been doing a shit job in his classes doesn't help at all, too. it's just manifesting ugly thoughts inside his head that he knows will probably eat him up if he keeps thinking about it.

and he tried not to let it consume him. he did. but everything is turning, everyone is changing, he can't help but feel out of the loop with all his classmates doing great and he's still stuck on that one formula from three days ago. so when nighttime falls, he doesn't go home. not when he's looking like _this_ , dead and a mess. he goes straight to the bus stop to go to a store he kept coming to back when he was still a freshman, just as stressed. when he enters the shack, he's welcomed with the scent of familiarity as he turns and greets the old lady manning the counter up front.

"oh, minhyung? is that you? i haven't seen you in forever!" she greets in a cheerful voice. mark gives her a small smile, bowing politely as he puts his bag on one of the corners of the room. "as much as i missed your cute face, isn't it a bit late to be out here alone?"

she's right. that bus ride alone took him almost 40 minutes and he knows he'll probably regret getting drunk off his ass on a school night but right now, he doesn't want to do anything but wallow in self pity, and maybe think. maybe.

"kinda..." mark trails. "but it's okay, it'll be quick. i just need to relieve some stress."

"i see," the woman nods, understanding. "what will you be having?"

"just two bottles," mark sighs. "and fried kimchi." he adds.

the woman laughs. "alright, alright. sit down, then. i'll just bring it to you when it's done."

mark walks towards his table and sighs the nth time, burying his hands in his palms. he's usually handled these academic breakdowns well. he puts up a strong fort and it took a lot to break it down but when it did, he knows how to calm himself. but he's telling himself, he's a third year student now. he should know how to keep up with the rest of the class at this point, what changed? is it because of donghyuck? of course, not. if anything, donghyuck had been a big help to him, both academically and mentally with all the times he's encouraged mark to do his best. is it his friends? no? is it because he's recently gone to parties he used to not bother himself with? mark doesn't know, he doesn't want to think.

when he feels tears brimming his eyes, he quickly wipes at them with harsh hands and grunts. _why am i so lame?_

he hears a tray being put down in front of him and looks up to see the woman, and thanks her for the food. "thank you."

"you're welcome," she pats his head. "school?"

mark doesn't say anything, just nods, not trusting his voice.

"i understand. it'll be better, you know. if you need anything else, i'll be at the counter, okay?" the woman gives him a soft pat in the back. mark smiles at her and nods once.

he takes a deep breath and exhales, before grabbing the first bottle and immediately chugging down the contents. he relishes the taste and cringes when he realizes he's already drank half of everything in there.

 _you're a mess, mark lee._ he finishes it completely and sets the bottle down to dig in his meal. he takes his chopsticks and looks at his food, _pretty_. his mind is drifting everywhere and anywhere to the point it's overwhelming him, it's ridiculous. he plays with his food for a while, just staring off into wherever.

his phone buzzes quietly, donghyuck's contact lighting up in his lockscreen. he tries to reach for his phone with trembling hands, and unlocks it to read the message.

 **sunshine** **8:52 PM:** where are you

mark tries to calm his breathing, he's _not_ going to have a breakdown inside this store. his fingers hover over his screen, typing out a reply.

 **mark 8:54 PM:** class

 **sunshine** **8:54 PM** : no youre not  
 **sunshine** **8:54 PM** : ur class ended an hour ago

 **mark 8:57 PM:** overtime

 **sunshine** **8:57 PM:** thats not what xiaojun hyung said  
 **sunshine** **8:57 PM:** mark where are you

god, he knew better than to lie to donghyuck, of all people. the younger always looked out for him, knew what to say to him and took care of him when he couldn't. but not _right now._ mark can't do this, right now. everything feels all too brittle to be dealing with donghyuck, he promised himself he's not going to cry.

mark shuts his phone off, putting it back on the pocket of his backpack and starts eating.  
  
  


everything feels like it's swirling, turning and it's hurting mark's head. he feels sensitive all over and he can't tell if he's crying or not. all he knows is he has a bottle of soju in hand, and a whole lot of emotions he's trying to keep inside. he stares down at the table, counting, 1, 2, 3, 4,...what comes after 4? 5... 6.. he's had six bottles already? what time is it anyway?

mark can't hold it anymore, he sinks his head and starts crying. all the emotions gushing out of him like a broken dam, eyes already stinging. god, he feels like a loser. he doesn't want to think right now, no. _i'm too stupid for that anyway._ he wipes harshly at the tears, as if it's going to stop himself from feeling like shit. he knows his eyes are red by now, maybe his cheeks too, considering how hard he's been rubbing at his face. _dumb_.

_"lee minhyung."_

mark's whole body shivers. why does that voice sound so familiar? he lifts his heavy eyelids from the table and sees a tuft of brown hair making its way to mark's table. donghyuck....

 _donghyuck_?

"mark," donghyuck looks furious, mark can't blame him. he sits next to mark, glaring daggers right into his soul. "where the hell have you been? do you know it's almost midnight and i had to wake everybody up just to find you?! what the fuck were you thinking?! are you aware that it's a tuesday night, and we have classes tomorrow? and why weren't you answering my fucking calls?!"

mark tries to laugh, strained and raspy. "who's there... hyuckie?"

"i swear to god, mark, i'm supposed to be the dumb one between us, i had to bother xiaojun hyung just to let him drive me here because your stupid ass goes miss - " donghyuck quiets down when mark touches his face, with his round doe eyes staring up at him, tears threatening to fall once again. donghyuck's eyes widen, surprised at seeing mark like this, how broken he looked. he gulps, trying to calm himself as he takes mark's hands in his, and pulls mark in for a bone crushing hug. "mark... mark, baby, i was so worried."

mark doesn't say anything and donghyuck decides not to push any further. "let's go home, please."

when donghyuck pays for all the drinks mark has consumed, he and xiaojun tries dragging mark's butt over to his car. "stay here, okay?" donghyuck tells him when he successfully manages to make mark stay put in the back seat but mark has other plans as he clings onto donghyuck's arm.

"nooooo, want hyuckie to stay with me..." mark hiccups over his words and he reeks of soju. staying with him means having to smell like shit, too, but it's not like donghyuck can refuse him.

xiaojun chuckles, amused as he starts the car's engine up, watching the two from the mirror, how mark keeps trying to hug donghyuck, and donghyuck letting himself be hugged by the little baby.

the car ride is quiet, mark silently playing with donghyuck's fingers and donghyuck rubbing his thumb over mark's hands. next thing xiaojun knows, he sees mark climbing on donghyuck's lap, whining low in his throat about how he missed the younger. xiaojun looks extremely horrified, debating if he should stop the car and kick them out or ignore them. the fact that donghyuck grabs on to mark's waist is not making xiaojun feel less relieved.

"please do not tell me you're going to fuck in the back of my car while i'm driving."

"are you crazy? we're not..." donghyuck sighs. "i just need to calm him down, sorry."

"right..." xiaojun teases and donghyuck rolls his eyes at him.

mark starts slurring words donghyuck can't understand, laying his head on donghyuck's shoulder and pressing his lips against the other's neck. when mark aims for his mouth, donghyuck pushes him away gently by the shoulders and tries not to get fazed by the way mark looks like he's about to cry any second.

"kiss?" mark purses his lips, frowning.

"no."

"w-why not?"

"please just rest. you need it."

"why won't you kiss me?" mark complains, pouting.

"mark, please calm down first, you need to - "

"am i disgusting, hyuckie? is that it? i-if that's the case, then... then, s-sorry! i'll... i'll be better! i'll get better, hyuckie, i - "

donghyuck is quick to shush the boy when he sees mark's eyes glistening, gently stroking his thumb against his cheek. "hey, hey, hey, no, of course not, idiot. you're not disgusting, why would you even think that? you're the loveliest, and i hope you know that. b-but you need to sober up first, okay? when we get home, you should shower and i'll prepare something for you to eat. then we'll talk."

mark hears xiaojun from the front sneak in a "whipped." and donghyuck kicks his seat in annoyance, earning a threat that they'll both be kicked out the car.

mark's head is still spinning but donghyuck is treating him so gently, not minding the weight on his lap and even stroking his tear-stained face, despite how ugly he thinks he looks right now. mark wants to cry all over again.

"we're here." xiaojun announces after a while of driving and mark's soft stifled sobs, and helps mark walk towards their room, with donghyuck trying to convince doyoung or taeyong (whoever they run into) with a believable enough excuse not to get them in trouble.

"thank you for everything, xiaojun hyung." donghyuck says, looking apologetic.

"it's no worries." xiaojun, the angel he is, waves a hand then points to mark, who was on the floor, starting to strip his clothes. "you should worry about him now."

"a-ah, yeah, you're right, thank you again..." donghyuck gives him a smile before closing the door gently when xiaojun excuses himself and walks away, bidding them goodnight. he then reverts his attention back to mark, who was now topless and only in his boxers.

"h-hyuckie, need you..." mark crawls. _crawls_ over to donghyuck, and kneels in front of him ready to take donghyuck's pants off but the younger's hands stop him.

"no," donghyuck says in an assertive tone. "you're going to shower first then come back here and _eat_. no fooling around, i'm serious."

"hm, okaaaaay..." mark giggles, making grabby hands at donghyuck, gesturing him to carry him to the bathroom.

donghyuck sighs but complies anyway, trying his best not to let mark fall and make them both topple over.

"donghyuck..." mark whispers in donghyuck's ear.

"what."

"thank you."

mark then tries to balance himself on both his feet, and shuts the bathroom door. the blush he sees on donghyuck's cheeks, he tells himself, is nothing. he sighs, turning the shower on and mentally slaps himself when he's started regaining his conscience.  
  
  


mark emerges from the bathroom fifteen minutes later, half sober half stupid, with only his sweatpants on, hair still incredibly wet. donghyuck is sitting on his bed with a plate of what seemed like half-assed kimchi jiggae prepared neatly on the table. mark joins him, humming softly to the song being playIed on donghyuck's bluetooth speaker.

"doyoung hyung might get mad at us..." mark whispers, referring to how loud the speakers are.

donghyuck turns it down a bit and faces mark. "are you sober now?"

mark wordlessly nods. right, of course, donghyuck's mad at him.

"go eat then." donghyuck nods to the plate readied on mark's table.

mark gets up from donghyuck's bed and starts eating, thanking him for the food. his head is bowed, feeling small with donghyuck's piercing gaze on him. he chews slowly, ignoring the throbbing pain on his head.

"do you even know worried i was about you?" donghyuck breaks the silence, the sharpness in his voice making mark flinch. "and how dangerous is it is to be getting out of the city at nine pm, for what, soju?"

mark remains silent.

"mark."

"i was stressed, donghyuck." mark can't even stop his voice from getting all wobbly.

"i understand that now, but you could've come to me, you know. i would've helped you... fine, drink. if that's what relieves your stress, i'm not going to stop you. in fact, why not invite me next time? my issue here is that," donghyuck's voice cracks. "mark, it's dangerous to be staying in a neighboring city until midnight drunk off your ass, you know that right? i know you're not stupid. something could've happened to you!"

"nothing did!" mark tries to argue. "donghyuck, please, i can't do this right now."

"listen to me when i'm talking to you-"

"no, you listen to _me_ ," mark furrows his eyebrows. "i know you're worried, _thanks_ , but i can handle myself. why do you have to treat me like a fucking baby all the time? i'm 21, hell, i'm older than you! it's not as dangerous as you're making it out to be, stop being so annoying!"

donghyuck looks taken aback, speechless. mark can't look at him in the eye. just when mark sees donghyuck opens his mouth, he starts speaking again. "i'm tired right now, donghyuck. how do you think i'm feeling right now? i feel so fucking stupid, donghyuck. you wouldn't know, you're naturally amazing. you don't have to work yourself too hard to be smart. hyuck, we're different. i have to exhaust myself first before i can even feel validated. just let me be. i'll figure it out somehow. plus, why do _you_ care so much anyway?"

donghyuck narrows his eyes at him. "what, are you saying i shouldn't?"

mark doesn't say anything. he looks at donghyuck with fear in his eyes, unable to read his expression.

"mark."

"yes! god, donghyuck, i can handle myself properly without you butting in all the goddamn time!" mark exclaims before he can even stop himself, unable to keep his tone firm and stable.

the silence is almost deafening, equivalent to the ringing in his ears. mark tries to blink away his tears when he sees donghyuck hang his head low.

"i see." donghyuck nods once, before reaching for his bag and taking something out. mark stays quiet, still, and before he knows it, donghyuck's marching towards the door.

"w-where are you going?" _is he going to leave me?_ no, no, no, that's not supposed to happen.

"outside."

_please look at me._

_i'm sorry, i'm sorry._

_let's fix this first._

"but doyoung hyung is-"

the door slams shut and mark is all alone again. he turns back at his unfinished meal and stares blankly. _ah, mark, you've done it once again._ minutes pass by so slowly and mark wants nothing else but for the ground to just swallow him, or something. his mind is racing, his chest is aching, aching for donghyuck who's probably at his usual hiding spot whenever he's out smoking. (yeah, the song playing in the background isn't doing much for his current state, either. thanks.)

mark holds back a choked sob and runs his hands through his hair. he stands up, takes the nearest top he can find and bursts through the door, and goes for donghyuck.

it doesn't take long to find him, but sneaking through the halls without doyoung noticing was. mark wonders how donghyuck can always get easily past them all. when he arrives, he immediately sees donghyuck with a cigarette in hand, blowing out smoke from his mouth.

mark staggers in his steps, hesitating if he should join donghyuck or just go back and cry himself to sleep. he thinks, maybe he should... maybe crying would be better but donghyuck turns his head and makes eye contact with him, startling mark.

"hyung."

mark walks slowly towards him, everything feeling all too heavy. "y-yes..."

when mark stands beside him, donghyuck doesn't talk. he breathes in the smoke and puffs it out, exhaling, shoulders relaxing. mark tries to keep his emotions at bay, feeling dumb when he doesn't know what to say.

donghyuck turns to him and gestures at his pack, silently asking if he wants to smoke too. mark swallows down the lump in his throat and takes one stick out for himself, slotting it between his lips. as donghyuck fumbles around for a lighter, mark feels a sudden jolt of bravery that makes him snake a hand around donghyuck's nape to bring him closer. he puts the cigarette butts together to get light from donghyuck's and thinks to himself, _dumbass_ , expecting donghyuck to be petty and tell him off that they're _fighting_ , they shouldn't be talking. but when none of that comes, he looks at donghyuck again just to see the faint red coloring his cheeks.

pretty.

mark breathes the smoke in, quickly exhaling it out and sighing.

they stand there quietly, appreciating the night mist. the silence was comfortable, at least.

"sorry."

mark whips his head to look at donghyuck, who puts his cigarette down, a glint in his eyes mark knows far too well. tears. mark does the same, putting the light out of his cigarette.

"w-why..." mark inhales, exhales. he might start crying too. "why are you apologizing... i should be the one who's i-"

"hyung," donghyuck leans closer, and mark doesn't know how to react when he sees a tear roll down the younger's face. "i-i'm sorry... i shouldn't have snapped at you like that. y-you... you were having a hard time and i, i put more burden into you. h-hyung, i'm sorry..."

mark's hands come up to wipe at donghyuck's tears, cradling the boy closer. "donghyuck, it's fine, _i'm_ fine. you were the one who still came to get me despite me being a dumbass. i'm thankful, really. and you're never going to be a burden to me, you know that."

donghyuck lets his head drop down mark's shoulder, seemingly to calm himself as he draws the older boy closer by the waist, inhaling the scent of smoke and perfume and just _mark_.

"i don't want us fighting." donghyuck states, voice threatening to crack, muffled by mark's skin.

"me too." mark whispers back.

"but i don't want you bottling everything up by yourself, too. it's unhealthy, you know," donghyuck half scolds him, making sure to make his tone gentler so mark wouldn't think he's trying to pick a fight again. "you can always come to me. or to any of our friends. we're always here for you, _i'm_ here for you."

mark snickers. "cute."

donghyuck grunts against his skin. "hyung, i'm serious."

"alright," mark breathes, taking donghyuck's face between his hands to pepper kisses along the lines of his scrunched up face. "okay, donghyuckie. thank you."

"want to tell me what's bothering you?" donghyuck asks, gently, eyes still glossy. "i'll listen. but of course, you don't have to if you don't want to."

mark sighs. "just... school."

donghyuck nods, attentive.

mark looks at him, donghyuck staring back, and sighs. "i just feel like everything is changing so quickly. everybody's moving on and flourishing or whatever, and i'm still. here. i have one year of college left and after that, i won't have anyone to rely on anymore but myself. but i don't think i'm ready, i don't think i'll be able to handle it, not when my brain isn't functioning. god, i'm from the engineering faculty but i don't know what i'm going to be doing after college. it's... scary."

"oh, hyung, that's completely valid and yeah, i can't really blame you. college is scary but the outside world is scarier. i'm really sorry for lashing out on you, you don't deserve it," donghyuck exhales and mark snorts, nodding his head. "you're a smart guy, markie. i know it'll take more than a few hits to stop you. you'll probably be back to your old self in no time. you're mark lee after all. but you know, whatever happens, you'll have me by your side for a _long_ time. so, we'll figure everything out together, yeah?"

mark's already rabbiting heart rattles faster, his eyes widening slightly at donghyuck's declaration. he feels at ease, so comforted by donghyuck's words with the promise of staying side by side forever, it just makes mark want to cry even more. he's speechless, not saying a word and donghyuck must've noticed his pinkish cheeks.

"a-ah, but of course, i-if you want to!" donghyuck retracts. "i mean, you probably don't want me annoying you all the time forever and that's _fine_ , b-but... i'm here for you, always, o-okay?"

mark feels his chest tighten, hands gripping donghyuck's own tighter. "forever, huh."

"y-yeah, f-forever..." donghyuck mumbles.

"i'd like that." mark kisses his cheek ever so gently, even startling donghyuck a bit. so soft, so gentle.

"good," donghyuck huffs, cheeks still red. he tugs at mark's hand softly. "let's go back?"

mark nods and suddenly, everything is okay again.

the walk back to their room is quiet, save for a few whispers coming from mark that they might wake their ra. donghyuck laughs at him before taking mark's hand in his to start running. mark is whisper shouting at him, telling him to calm down but donghyuck only giggles and holds his hand tighter before swinging the door to their room open, locking it safely.

"i can't believe you," mark glares at him, trying to steady his breathing. "god, why do you always want to smoke in a place so far away from our room?"

"it's better to do it there so no one can bother me _and_ i don't bother anyone." donghyuck winks at him, shooting finger guns.

mark rolls his eyes and lets himself fall to the softness of his bed. "you left your speakers on." 

"hm, yeah..." mark sees donghyuck walking closer before the other eventually lays down beside him, both of them staring at the cream paint of the ceiling.

seconds pass, minutes. mark's heart is beating too loudly, being this close to donghyuck. (as if he isn't, all the time.) too loud for him to let his eyes close and chase his sleep. mark looks at his side and sees donghyuck still staring upwards, looking like he's lost in his thoughts.

a familiar tune starts splaying out the speakers and donghyuck quickly turns to his side to look at mark. "isn't this your favorite song?"

_i wanna see your pom poms from the stands_

_come on, come on_

"h-huh? oh...yeah, yeah it is." mark splutters.

the weight from the bed disappears and donghyuck takes off his side to stand in front of him, reaching for mark's hands. "come on..."

"what?" mark asks intelligently.

"dance with me."

mark almost chokes on thin air and he's sure his cheeks are the reddest they've ever been, praying that it's not noticeable in the dim lit room. donghyuck is pulling at his arms and mark is suddenly feeling overwhelmed all over again - in the best way possible.

"w-what? a-are you crazy? why would i-"

donghyuck tugs mark's body towards him, bursting into a fit of laughter. he's swaying mark clumsily, still giggling and mark can't help but laugh with him. _this feels nice._ kinda romantic, too. donghyuck puts mark's arms around his waist and puts his around mark's neck, leaning a tad bit closer.

"forrest gump, you run my mind, boy..." donghyuck starts singing along in perfected english.

"how come you know the lyrics?" mark chuckles.

"well, i mean, i've been listening to the song..." donghyuck replies sarcastically, earning a playful slap in the chest.

"running on my mind, boy..." mark hums along, ignoring the intense gaze donghyuck has on him.

"yeah, you are." donghyuck whispers almost inaudibly that mark _almost_ wasn't able to catch it.

"what do you-"

before mark can finish his sentence, donghyuck's already trying to speed up their movements to match the tempo of the song. he's swaying side by side in an exaggerated manner, making mark stifle a giggle or two.

"come on, you're not even dancing!" donghyuck whines, shaking him by the shoulders.

mark flushes an all new bright red. "shut up, like you're any better."

and donghyuck coos at him for it, telling him, "you're adorable."

"fuck off." mark spits but donghyuck coos even harder.

_forrest gump, my finger tips and my lips_

_they burn from the cigarettes_

"ew, i forgot how much of a good singer you are."

"was that supposed to be a compliment?"

"kinda."

"you're unbelievable."

donghyuck laughs and moves faster, sillier making laughter bubble up on mark's chest, feeling all too warm. mark closes his eyes for a second and the next thing he knows, he hears donghyuck's whining.

"what?" mark asks dumbly.

"you stepped on my foot!" donghyuck groans but not showing any signs of pushing mark away.

"you kinda deserve it." mark sticks his tongue out.

"oh, please, i'm slow dancing you to your favorite song, and this is what i get?" donghyuck huffs cutely. "i deserve a kiss."

"are you telling me to kiss your foot?" mark teases, earning a short chuckle from donghyuck.

"i mean, if you're into that..." donghyuck wiggles his eyebrows and mark slaps his chest playfully.

when the giggles simmers down and donghyuck is staring at him with fires in his eyes, mark's heart hammers faster.

donghyuck leans closer, and closer. closer. until their foreheads are touching, fire blazing against their skin, as if they've entered a new territory. mark tries to slow his breathing, and stops altogether when donghyuck presses his plump, soft lips against his. donghyuck's hands are off mark's shoulders and is now under his tank top, rubbing the soft plush of flesh, making mark absolutely lose his mind. they're still moving to the beat of the music, a bit fast to mark's liking (a bit off beat, even) but when donghyuck has his hands on him like this, he could care any less.

donghyuck tugs at the hem of mark's shirt before lifting and taking it off completely, drawing back to admire the beauty of mark's body. mark suddenly feels self-conscious and shrinks visibly, sputtering, "w-what are you looking at..."

"you're beautiful." donghyuck replies almost too quickly and then his mouth his on him again.

mark has to restrain a whimper from when donghyuck starts sucking a hickey on his collarbones, the younger's hands making its way to the perk of mark's butt. "god, mark, you're driving me crazy."

"donghyuck..." mark breathes, grabbing hold of donghyuck's face and kisses him deeply, tongue sticking out to lick at donghyuck's lips.

donghyuck moans softly into the kiss, hands pulling at mark's locks. mark groans, pushing donghyuck into his bed, lips still on his body. "i... i want to fuck you."

donghyuck gasps, clearly not expecting that.

"okay," the younger boy exhales shakily. "okay... god, yes, mark, fuck me."

donghyuck doesn't even need to be told, already knowing what to do as he gestures where the lube and pack of condoms were located for mark to use. mark's hands are trembling, also shocked he would be in such a position (when all the times they've had sex, he always bottomed).

when donghyuck is stripped off his clothes, mark is already coating his fingers with lube. donghyuck gets on all fours, perking his ass in the air, wiggling gently.

"jesus fucking christ." mark exhales. will he even last long? he doesn't know. he'd already been hard the moment donghyuck took his clothes off and now, _this_. with the darkness of the room, only the (stupid, mark had it called it once) neon fairy lights donghyuck likes to put up his wall, the younger looks completely amazing, _astonishing_.

"hyuck..."

"do it. please, mark."

his hands are cold when it makes its way to donghyuck's hole, making the other jump slightly. mark chuckles, breathily, almost nervously. he manages to push the first finger in, whimpering slightly at the moan donghyuck releases. "fuck, baby, one more please."

mark nods, complying and pushes the second finger in. _tight_. mark swallows the lump in his throat, he's growing harder each second and donghyuck gives him the pleasure of pumping his cock while he's working on donghyuck's hole. when donghyuck starts stroking him faster, harder, mark begins pistoning his fingers in and out of donghyuck's hole, eyes narrowing at the glorious amount of lube making squelching sounds as he does. donghyuck is whining low in his throat, eyes squeezing shut as he chants mark's name over and over again.

it takes a few more pushes before mark actually finds donghyuck's prostate and when he does, the younger boy jumps at the fingers jabbing at his spot, letting out a moan that can't possibly be covered up by the (now) lana del ray song playing in the background. mark tries not to whine as well, but god, donghyuck is _so_ hot, his mind is everywhere, anywhere, a jumbled mess, all just donghyuck donghyuck donghyuck. "shit... shit, mark, i'm going to come, _please_ fuck me already."

mark gulps down his nervousness, it's been a while since he topped after all. he sits up on his knees, and pours a generous amount of lube on donghyuck's hole (to make sure) and on his dick, stroking it to the look on donghyuck's face, utterly and completely blissed. their eyes lock and mark feels heat coming to his cheeks, donghyuck managing a breathy laugh. "cute." jesus, how does donghyuck do that? mark is about to fuck his brains out and he's still praising him, calling him cute, calling him pet names, mark might actually lose his mind.

donghyuck tries to pull mark closer, and when mark brushes his cock slightly at donghyuck's entrance, he lets out an embarrassing moan mark is sure to tease him for later. donghyuck spreads his legs further, inviting, tempting mark to just come in already but mark takes his time, kissing around donghyuck's soft tummy, his neck, the insides, the outside of his thighs, his neck, he can't help but admire the pretty blush setting off donghyuck's body. even his moles are driving him straight to insanity. "you're so beautiful."

"mark," donghyuck whimpers, hands sliding up and down mark's torso. "mark, baby, fuck me please."

mark giggles at his impatience and plants one last kiss on donghyuck's button nose before guiding his cock back into the other's awaiting entrance. he pushes in, grumbling a mess of gibberish curse words, donghyuck doing the same. mark waits patiently for donghyuck to adjust to the size of his girth, knowing he probably hadn't bottomed in forever. donghyuck is letting out quiet whimpers before eventually, he speaks up again. "i-i'm ready..."

"you sure?"

"of course."

"o-okay..." mark breathes in before testing the waters, pushing in further and back. donghyuck gasps lightly, head lolling to the side. "fuck, you're so hot."

hyuck's voice is strained, but he chuckles softly against mark's mouth anyway. "thank you, markie. you too."

mark's panting wildly, the tightness sending pleasure to his cock and donghyuck clenching around him just makes it even worse (better), mark can't help but let moans out from his lips.

"a-am i doing g-good?" mark stutters, hips starting to increase its pace and _he is._ he knows he's doing good, just by looking, _listening_ to his best friend's moans, he can tell. but he needs validation, _praise_. (yeah, he has a praise kink, so what.) he's in that submissive headspace again where all he can think about is receive pleasure, give pleasure.

"yeah, ah fuck, you're doing so good, baby." donghyuck gives him a small smile before his eyebrows scrunch again, at the feeling of mark inside him. "doing so good for me, always doing your best to make me feel good, aren't you, angel?"

mark feels tears gathering in his eyes, nodding dumbly. "y-yes, hyuckie, want... want to make you feel so, so good always, a-all the time."

"ah, faster, baby." donghyuck urges on, slapping mark's thighs.

mark whimpers, dropping down to nose at donghyuck's cheek, increasing his pace and pushing deeper. he grabs hold of the lobes of donghyuck's ass and punctures harder, deeper. donghyuck's eyes rolls back to the back of his head, letting out the highest whine. mark's cheeks blossom a pretty pink color, pride washing over him knowing he's the one responsible for all the sounds donghyuck is making.

"fuck," donghyuck breathes. "it's so big."

mark whines, blushing even harder, if that's possible. he wasn't _big_ big, but it was a good size and donghyuck is just fueling his praise kink even more. the thrusts don't stop, speeding even more when donghyuck starts pushing his hips back.

"come... i n-need to come." mark says once he feels his stomach tighten at all the pleasure, fingers digging deeper into donghyuck's skin, it really might leave red marks.

"go on, baby," donghyuck strokes mark's tear stained face, feeling mark trembling above him. "come inside me."

mark gasps, going faster before finally slowing down to shoot his cum inside donghyuck's hole, the younger whimpering at the feeling of getting filled up, releasing his own after a few seconds when mark tries overstimulating himself by fucking donghyuck harder. mark feels donghyuck's hands leave his back and come up to his face, wiping at the drying tears. he brings mark's forehead closer, pressing a soft kiss there. "you did amazing, baby."

"t-thank you, hyuckie, felt so good." mark whispers, succumbing to donghyuck's warmth. he pulls out, a flow of white leaking out of hyuck's entrance.

mark collapses on top of donghyuck, both of them reeking of cigarettes and sex. hyuck starts stroking his dark locks, mark laying silently on top of donghyuck's stomach. "tired?"

"kinda." mark mumbles.

hands find their way into mark's hair and mark sighs in content

"as much as i love to lay here with you," donghyuck giggles. "drying cum inside my asshole isn't really a comfortable feeling."

"o-oh," mark quickly sits up, letting donghyuck do the same. "right..."

the younger only chuckles softly before kissing the side of mark's mouth. he gets up to make his way for the bathroom and mark has to slap himself when he finds his eyes trailing donghyuck's ass. donghyuck even had the nerve to wiggle a bit. "i know you're staring."

mark squeeks. "i-i'm not... sorry."

donghyuck laughs, shaking his head. he looks back at mark, who was now wiping at the mess on him as well.

"hyung?"

"hm?" 

"i love you."

mark's eyes widen at the statement, knowing donghyuck has _never_ said those words before. his throat suddenly feels dry as a desert, brain malfunctioning, not exactly knowing how to respond. he tries not to shake. _i love you too._ say it back. _i love you too._ don't make him wait. _i love you too._ donghyuck is still standing there, probably waiting for something, _something_. but mark is still in shock, and before he knows it, donghyuck's gone.

_what the fuck was that?_

a confession?

mark's mind is in jumbles again.

a knock then disturbs mark's train of thought, and his face pales. he grabs a pair of briefs and boxers before walking towards the door to answer whoever it was. (mark's sure it was one of their ra's.)

and he's right, when he opens the door to a fuming doyoung. "mark... it's 2 in the goddamn morning, and right now, i'm not even mad. just please, _please_ shut the fuck up and try to not have sex in ungodly hours if the morning. _please_."

"i-i'm sorry! i'm sorry! it'll never happen again, i promise! we're really sorry..."

doyoung says nothing else before walking away.

mark shuts the door, defeated. donghyuck walks up to him with only a pair of boxers on, hair still sticking out in all sorts of directions. "doyoungie hyung?"

"the one and only."

donghyuck giggles, wrapping his arms around mark's neck. "what'd he say?"

 _oh_ , he's back to normal.

"that we shouldn't be...uh, having sex at this hour," mark clears his throat in embarrassment before scowling at donghyuck. "and he's right, we shouldn't."

"aw, why not?"

"are you serious right now."

"fine, i'll fuck you during the day, then."

"please shut up."

**mark 8:14 AM:** HELP

 **renjun 8:14 AM:** NO

 **mark 8:14 AM** : damn....  
 **mark 8:14 AM** : woke up in the wrong side of the bed or smth????

 **renjun 8:16 AM:** theres no WAKING UP if i cant even fucking SLEEP BECAUSE OF DKKNGHYUCKS ANNIYINGNMOANS AND UR ANNOYINGWHINES

 **mark 8:18 AM:** ...

 **renjun 8:18 AM:** DONT ... ME BITCH

 **mark 8:18 AM** : i

 **renjun 8:18 AM** : THE WALLS  
 **renjun 8:18 AM:** ARE THIN

 **mark 8:18 AM:** .....

 **renjun 8:19 AM** : I DONT KNOW WHAT TO SAY RIGHT NOW  
 **renjun 8:19 AM** : I HATE U BOTH

 **mark 8:20 AM** : IM SORRY

 **renjun 8:20 AM:** ...  
 **renjun 8:20 AM:** give me a second

 **mark 8:20 AM** : okay ╯﹏╰

 **renjun 8:24 AM:** ok im back  
 **renjun 8:24 AM** : still scarred but whatever!!!!!

 **mark 8:25 AM:** i  
 **mark 8:25 AM** : im really sorry

 **renjun 8:25 AM** : sigh  
 **renjun 8:26 AM** : its okay

 **mark 8:26 AM:** IM GENUINELY SORRY OK  
 **mark 8:26 AM** : ANYWAY I NEED HELP

 **renjun 8:26 AM:** what for

 **mark 8:27 AM:** hyuck kinda  
 **mark 8:27 AM:** maybe  
 **mark 8:27 AM:** sorta  
 **mark 8:27 AM** : said.....  
 **mark 8:31 AM** : the l word

 **renjun 8:31 AM** : THE L WORD  
 **renjun 8:31 AM** : HUH  
 **renjun 8:31 AM** : WHAT THE FUCK

 **mark 8:31 AM** : I KNOW  
 **mark 8:32 AM:** like WHY would he say that

 **renjun 8:32 AM:** maybe because HE DOES?????

 **mark 8:33 AM:** I THOUGHT THIS WAS STRICTLY PHYSICAL  
 **mark 8:33 AM** : HES NEVER SAID THAT BEFORE

 **renjun 8:34 AM:** WHAT DID U SAY

 **mark 8:34 AM** : NOTHING

 **renjun 8:34 AM:** what

 **mark 8:36 AM:** I PANICKED I DIDNT KNOW WHAT TO DO

 **renjun 8:36 AM:** SO U KEPT HIM WAITING

 **mark 8:36 AM** : I DIDNT  
 **mark 8:37 AM** : maybe i kinda did  
 **mark 8:37 AM** : BUT HE WAS ABOUT TO CLEAN THE CUM OUT OF HIS ASS ANYWAY SO

 **renjun 8:37 AM** : IM LITERALLY GOING TO FUCKING KILL U  
 **renjun 8:37 AM:** I DONT NEED DETAILS ASSHOLE

 **mark 8:38 AM:** ok sorry  
 **mark 8:38 AM:** BUT WHAT DO I NOW

 **renjun 8:38 AM:** SAY IT BACK??????

 **mark 8:40 AM** : NO  
 **mark 8:40 AM:** he probably...  
 **mark 8:40 AM** : just felt it in the moment but didnt actually mean it :( i cant risk our friendship  
 **mark 8:41 AM** : plus after that he just went back to normal as if he didnt say it at all

 **renjun 8:41 AM:** maybe because he felt embarrassed u didnt say u love him too???

 **mark 8:41 AM** : but

 **renjun 8:41 AM** : also mark no offense  
 **renjun 8:41 AM** : but this "i cant risk our friendship" excuse is getting OLD like u  
 **renjun 8:42 AM** : hyuck wouldnt kiss u , do nasty things with u or even tell u that He Loves You if he doesnt

 **mark 8:42 AM** : :(  
 **mark 8:42 AM** : what are u saying i do then

 **renjun 8:42 AM:** follow ur heart for once??  
 **renjun 8:43 AM** : i know its scary but if u keep thinking of the negative possibilities, thats going to hinder u to even say what u feel about him until we all graduate and move on to a different part of our lives and he moves on and probably meets someone new and ur still wallowing in regret bc ur in love with him and

 **mark 8:44 AM** : OK I THINK I GET IT  
 **mark 8:44 AM:** i really really dont want to lose donghyuck

 **renjun 8:44 AM** : THEN DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT DUMMY  
 **renjun 8:45 AM** : or dont and let regret consume u

 **mark 8:45 AM** : damn ok....

 **renjun 8:45 AM** : GOOD  
 **renjun 8:45 AM:** and mark  
 **renjun 8:46 AM** : he loves u ok  
 **renjun 8:46 AM:** a Lot  
 **renjun 8:46 AM** : anyone with eyes can tell

 **mark 8:48 AM:** ...okay  
 **mark 8:48 AM** : thank you renjun :(

 **renjun 8:48 AM** : ur welcome<3  
 **renjun 8:49 AM** : NOW GO GET YOUR MAN  
  
  


mark's course of action (operation: don't get your hopes up or odguhu, "that's just lame." xuxi comments.) is to avoid donghyuck. which, according to renjun and xuxi, is a bad idea. and yeah, _maybe_ , it is. running away from his problems gay panics has become a regular thing and it's not the best way to solve anything but it's whatever, he tells himself.

odguhu may be a bit of a fail too, considering that he can't really bring himself to really ignore donghyuck, not when the boy didn't even do anything remotely wrong in the first place, and if he's being ten times cuter than he actually is. everytime donghyuck asks for a kiss, mark would give it anyway. to say he has mark wrapped around his finger is an understatement.

("kiss?" donghyuck purses his lips.

"no."

"markie~"

"no."

"come on, please?"

"no."

"just one?"

"god, fuck, fine!" mark wants to explode, and he really thinks he might. he opens his arms wide. "c'mere."

donghyuck leaps into his lap and let's just say it wasn't just one kiss as promised.)

yeah, avoiding donghyuck seemed better in his head.

_i love you._

mark can't stop thinking about it, he might go crazy. he can't get the image of donghyuck looking at him with _those_ eyes, saying the words mark had always wanted to hear from him ever since he was like, 16? ridiculous. _i love you too._ mark wants to just go tell him, right now. _more than you know._

even with renjun's encouraging (threatening) words, mark can't bring himself to even look at donghyuck after that incident. donghyuck seems to be acting normal, the usual way he does - flirty and always asking for kisses, mark might feel a bit discouraged because maybe he _did_ just say it in a 'heat of the moment' thing. just thinking about it makes mark's stomach drop.

when donghyuck comes home that night, mark is working on something for his calculus class. donghyuck throws his backpack on his bed and immediately goes straight for mark, attacking his neck with the most gentle kisses. mark shudders, surprised.

"hello to you too?" mark tries to chuckle.

donghyuck hums, grabbing at mark's face to make mark face him. "hi."

"hi..." mark greets back and he's sure his whole face is read, thoughts running wild in his mind.

"hey." donghyuck giggles, aiming for his forehead.

"what's... w-what's- is there something, uh, wrong?" mark grins awkwardly while donghyuck laughs at him. he sits on the edge of mark's bed, pouting.

"nothing's wrong with _me_ , but i can sense something is wrong with you." donghyuck pokes mark's cheek with his finger, lips forming into an even poutier pout.

"m-me?" mark stutters and oh god, is he going to confront him?

"yes, you." donghyuck nods slowly, hands now on mark's own.

"uh... um, w-what're you talking about?"

"you're doing that thing!"

"thing? what thing?"

"that thing you always do when something's obviously bothering you and you only do it with me. yeah, i've noticed that," donghyuck squints. "you get really stuttery! and you've been ignoring me. did i do something wrong?"

"what!" mark squeaks embarrassingly. "no, of course not! and i do... n-not have a thing."

"is it because doyoung hyung got mad at us?"

"no!"

"is it because renjun got mad at us?"

"no!"

"is it because i let you cum inside me?"

"n-no! god, how do you say that without getting embarrassed?"

"is it because i used your towel?"

"what, n- wait, you used my towel? why? b-but, no! just stop, hyuck, it's nothing, really."

"nothing," donghyuck repeats, still suspecting. "nothing, huh?"

"y-yeah, it's nothing." mark tries to smile.

"fine," donghyuck gives up then climbs mark's lap, causing the older to grunt in pain at the sudden weight on him. "i'll believe you. for now."

mark shuts him up with a kiss and it was enough for donghyuck to forget and melt in his arms.

the next day, donghyuck goes to him again, asking if he doesn't want to be a bitch anymore and just tell him what was bothering him. mark's already ruined mood just caused him to slam donghyuck into the wall, kissing him deeply.

the day after, donghyuck gets down on his knees and sucks mark dry thinking it would get him to say it. mark scoffs, even after being reduced to a blabbering mess, telling him there was nothing to worry about so he should just drop it.

("tell me."

"no."

"tell me."

"no."

"come on, tell me~"

"no."

"mark."

"no."

"stingy.")

that's when they decide, they're done with each other's bullshit.  
  


**_< heterophobes, 9 people > _ **

**hendery 8:21 AM:** who wants to tell hyuck n mark to stop acting like babies

 **xiaojun 8:22 AM** : i would but im getting tired too

 **renjun 8:22 AM** : same honestly

 **jeno 8:22 AM** : @mark @hyuck stop acting like babies

 **mark 8:24 AM** : ?

 **hyuck 8:24 AM:** excuse ME  
 **hyuck 8:24 AM** : i didnt do anything!!!

 **jeno 8:25 AM:** just pass him the fucking salt mark

 **mark 8:25** **AM:** no

 **jaemin 8:25 AM** : stop texting while eating

 **hyuck 8:25 AM** : nana baby tell mark to stop acting like a dick and just pass the salt

 **mark 8:26 AM** : u hate salt

 **hyuck 8:26 AM** : ur just homophobic

 **yangyang 8:43 AM** : oof

 **xuxi 8:44 AM:** what happened

 **yangyang 8:45 AM** : nana got mad because they were both acting childish this is u and renjun are the only couple ever

 **xuxi 8:46 AM** : thats right <3

 **hyuck 8:47 AM** : excuse me i am right here

 **yangyang 8:47 AM** : and

 **mark 8:47 AM:** we're not a couple

 **yangyang 8:48 AM** : aw dont be sad u'll get there eventually  
 **yangyang 8:48 AM** : although im suggesting u do it faster before hyuck answers that guy from calc

 **mark 8:49 AM** : how is that my concern

 **hyuck 8:49 AM** : dont be so jealous

 **mark 8:49 AM** : the fuck? im not

 **hyuck 8:49 AM:** sureee  
 **hyuck 8:49 AM:** maybe i should go for minho instead

 **mark 8:50 AM** : maybe u should  
 **mark 8:50 AM** : see if he fucks u any better than i do

 **xuxi 8:51 AM:** MARK

 **jeno 8:51 AM:** MARK

 **hendery 8:51 AM:** MARK

 **renjun 8:52 AM:** i thought u said u bottomed

 **yangyang 8:52 AM:** RENJUNDHJDJSHDB

 **hyuck 8:53 AM:** i let u top One time and ur suddenly acting big as if u werent all over my dick yesterday

 **hendery 8:54 AM** : gross is this how u guys sext

 **xiaojun 8:54 AM:** dont u have private messages

 **hyuck 8:54 AM** : fine  
  
  
  


 **sunshine 8:55 AM:** bitch

 **mark 8:55 AM:** no u

 **sunshine 8:55 AM:** acting cocky in front of them huh  
 **sunshine 8:56 AM:** is that some kind of kink

 **mark 8:56 AM** : fuck off donghyuck

 **sunshine 8:56 AM** : cute  
 **sunshine 8:57 AM** : taunting me with ur dick  
 **sunshine 8:57 AM** : do u think thatd make me crack

 **mark 8:57 AM** : not really  
 **mark 8:57 AM** : ur pretty stubborn

 **sunshine 8:57 AM:** good that u know

 **mark 8:57 AM:** now get off my messages

 **sunshine 8:57 AM** : no ur listening to me  
 **sunshine 8:58 AM:** why cant u just Tell me whats going on  
 **sunshine 8:58 AM:** if its my fault id try to fix it, u know that  
 **sunshine 8:58 AM:** why are u bitching on me so much i just want to know the truth so we can stop fighting

 **mark 8:59 AM:** i already told u countless times that its nothing but do u listen? no

 **sunshine 9:00 AM** : i wouldve believed u the first time if u arent fucking ignoring me all the time  
sunshine 9:00 AM: i know somethings up so just tell me what it is

 **mark 9:00 AM:** no go away

 **sunshine 9:01 AM:** mark

 **mark 9:01 AM:** night

 **sunshine 9:02 AM:** im not done

 **mark 9:02 AM:** no just leave me aloooone

 **sunshine 9:02 AM** : what the fuck  
 **sunshine 9:03 AM** : do u want to just continue ignoring me  
 **sunshine 9:03 AM** : is that it  
 **sunshine 9:03 AM** : why do u want to shut me out so bad?

 **mark 9:04 AM:** im not shutting u out dumbass  
 **mark 9:06 AM:** cant i go a day without talking to u

 **sunshine 9:06 AM** : Why  
 **sunshine 9:06 AM** : fuck this im calling u  
 **sunshine 9:07 AM** : u better pick up

truth be told, donghyuck calls him a beat later. mark takes a deep breath, and clears his throat. "what do you want, fuckhead?"

"stop being a fucking baby," donghyuck huffs. "tell me what's wrong."

"how many times do i have to tell you, nothing's wrong? stop bothering me already." mark almost presses the red button to hang up when donghyuck's booming voice interrupts him.

"well, then stop ignoring me!" donghyuck exclaims exasperatedly. "if you don't want to fucking tell me, fine, whatever! just stop avoiding all the time, do you know how fucking childish you're acting? weren't we okay just a few days ago?"

mark stays silent over the line, not trusting his voice. a thought runs over his mind and suddenly there's that loud thumping in his chest again. should he just tell him the truth? he sighs softly. "where are you?"

"class, why?"

"what?" mark hisses, eyebrows furrowing. "are you dumb? stop calling me, oh my god, i'm hanging up-"

"don't!" donghyuck cuts him off, mark groaning at the loudness of his voice. "prof isn't here, let's keep talking. i wouldn't call if he was here, you know that."

"just... just g-go here after you're done," mark replies slowly _. i love you._ maybe this is the right time to confess, to come clean, to just _say_ it. _i love you._ "i-i have t-to tell you... something."

donghyuck doesn't say anything for a few seconds, only hearing mark trying to steady his breathing. "mark? are you okay?" he asks, oh so gently.

"'m fine, just... just c-come here after your class, okay?"

"okay, yeah, o-of course," donghyuck gulps. "but is everything fine? you seem a bit... panicky. you'd tell me if... y-you get an-"

" _yes_ , donghyuck," mark replies hastily, not wanting to bring it up. "i-i'd tell you. but that isn't the case, n-not today."

"alright," donghyuck sighs in relief. i trust you."

"yeah, just... come here a-after your classes, okay?"

"okay... okay, i'll see you, hm?" donghyuck's voice sounds so mellow, so sweet, different from just seconds ago.

mark laughs a bit. "weren't you calling me a 'fucking baby' just earlier?"

"and weren't you referring to me as a fuckhead?" donghyuck laughs heartily and mark can tell he's rolling his eyes.

"sorry 'bout that..."

"it's fine, dummy," donghyuck reassures. "i don't want us fighting, remember?"

"yeah..." mark trails. "yeah, me too. sorry for being stubborn."

"it's okay. sorry for being so pushy, too. i'll hang up now? see you."

"see you."

when donghyuck hangs up, mark immediately buries his head into the pillow, screaming internally.

 _shit_.  
  


**mark 10:12 AM** : RENJUN HELP

 **renjun 10:13 AM** : no

 **mark 10:13 AM:** PLEASE  
 **mark 10:13 AM:** IM GOING TO CONFESS TO HYUCK

 **renjun 10:13 AM:** wait  
 **renjun 10:14 AM** : fr????

 **mark 10:14 AM** : p-perhaps

 **renjun 10:14 AM** : werent yall fighting two hours ago

 **mark 10:15 AM:** we were but i hate fighting with him it makes me feel empty and alone :(

 **renjun 10:15 AM:** baby :(  
 **renjun 10:16 AM** : i know the feeling ur valid  
 **renjun 10:16 AM:** so u made up?

 **mark 10:16 AM:** yup  
 **mark 10:16 AM:** hes coming over later  
 **mark 10:17 AM** : AND IMGOING TO CONFESS

 **renjun 10:17 AM:** OMGGGG MARK  
 **renjun 10:17 AM** : ARE YOU LIKE FR NOW  
 **renjun 10:17 AM** : IM SO PROUD OF U  
 **renjun 10:17 AM** : WHAT DO U NEED HELP WITH

 **mark 10:18 AM:** IDK

 **renjun 10:18 AM** : girl..

 **mark 10:19 AM** : HHHHH  
 **mark 10:19 AM** : I JUST  
 **mark 10:19 AM:** IM NERVOUS I NEEDED SOMEONE TO TALK TO

 **renjun 10:20 AM** : OKAY VALID  
 **renjun 10:20 AM** : i know how scary confessing is :( ut i also know that hyuckie loves u So So much so dont worry too much okay? if he rejects u, ill buy u all the ice cream u need

 **mark 10:20 AM:** REHJECTTT??!!YYJJ":#("5!

 **renjun 10:21 AM** : WAIT NO FUCK  
 **renjun 10:21 AM** : I MEANT  
 **renjun 10:22 AM:** markie baby he Wont reject u i just know it hyuck loves u too much for that. just stay true to yourself and say what youve always wanted to say. he loves sincerity

 **mark 10:22 AM:** T___________T  
 **mark 10:23 AM:** ty renjunnie kinda crying rn

 **renjun 10:23 AM:** UR WELCOME <3 ALWAYS  
  
  


"mark?"

mark jumps at the voice, head lifting from his pillow, wiping at his face. donghyuck pokes his head out from outside, seeing to see if mark was inside. he etches his eyebrows, seeing the tears glistening on his cheek and quickly runs over to kneel beside mark's bed. "mark? mark, baby, why're you crying? talk to me please."

mark chuckles softly. "nothing, i'm okay, i-it's just renjun..."

"renjun? i'll kill him-"

"no, no, no, hyuckie," mark giggles, pulling donghyuck by the arm and makes space for him in the bed, motioning him to join in.

donghyuck quiets down and climbs in, flashing mark a small, reassuring smile before mark continues. "something to tell me?"

"y-yeah..."

"go on."

"donghyuck..." mark breathes in, then out. then in again, _guess it's time_. no turning back now. he just convinces himself, whatever happens will be okay, and won't be the end of everything. "hyuck, you're... the most important person in my life and we've known each other for how many years now. every second feels absolutely amazing when i'm with you and i'm so thankful that you're in my life."

mark exhales slowly and donghyuck takes mark's hand in his, urging him on.

"i-i wanted to apologize for being so... distant the past week and for pushing you away even though you deserve a good explanation. a-and i'm going to give it to you. right now. right here. fuck, i'm so lame, this sounded better in my head..." mark chuckles breathily, donghyuck doing the same. "a-anyway, hyuck, you've always been the person i... i l-love the most and you'll always be. s-so, i guess i've been ignoring you w-was because i was shocked, when you said you l-loved me."

"mark?" donghyuck squeezes tighter. "w-where is this going?"

fuck. fuck fuck fuck fuck. mark's hands are probably sweating. but he has to continue. he needs to. he shuts his eyes for a second, breathes in. then out. "i was surprised b-because... you've never said that before. and i-i was sad. b-because you probably only said it in l-like a h-heat of the moment thing, and i felt like shit, because... i wanted to say those words to you f-for so, so long now. but i'm a coward."

mark feels nimble fingers touch his wet cheek, and _oh_ , he's crying again. he ducks his head in embarrassment and uses his shirt to wipe it off. "a-anyway... i understand i-if that's the case. i just wanted to get this off my chest, it's been how many y-years now and i just wanted to say it. i love you."

there it is.

"i love you, donghyuck. i love you, so, so much..." mark tries to hold back an incoming sob but fails to do so and feels arms wrap around his frame. "i don't know how many years it has been now. i kind of, stopped counting after the fourth. b-but, hyuck, i'll always be your friend. we've always had this weird relationship going on between us ever since high school a-and i've been so scared to bring it up because i didn't want to lose you. but here i am confessing, anyway..."

mark laughs bitterly against donghyuck's chest, who still has him caged under his arms but being oddly quiet. and so, mark continues. "if you don't feel the same, i'll be okay with it. i don't want to p-pressure you into anything that makes you uncomfortable. i love you so much. i'm in love with you. so much. i-i just wanted to say it... yeah..."

fuck, that feels like a major weight lifted off his chest. mark's kind of relieved.

"hyuck?"

mark panics when he hears a sniffle. "donghyuck?"

"mark..." donghyuck's crying. he's clawing at mark's shirt, hiding his face on mark's neck. "i'm sorry."

 _oh_.

mark tries not to think about it too much. he should've expected this. he tries to chuckle, to reassure donghyuck that this is okay. "it's okay, hyuckie. l-like i said, i'll be okay if you don't feel-"

"no, you idiot," donghyuck interrupts, shaking mark carefully. "i-i'm apologizing because... i've dragged you in this s-since high school. god, i feel so awful. you've been bottling this up for so long and it's all because _i_ wanted to be selfish."

"w-what are you saying?"

"remember when i kissed you that night," donghyuck mutters almost inaudibly. "for the first time."

the first time...

"of course." mark snickers, hands rubbing circles on donghyuck's back, mind drifting off to the memory of clumsy little pecks and getting pinned against the door.

"i-i was scared that time. scared that you would find someone better in college," donghyuck cries. "a-and i know it's stupid, i should've just told you how i felt instead of playing this game for far too long. mark, i'm sorry, i'm so sorry, i should've just... should've just, came clean as well."

"s-so-"

"so that means... _i love you_. i love you too. so much and more."

mark gasps quietly, everything moving too fast for his brain to process and for his heart to believe. donghyuck said it again. and he's confessing this time.

"mark," donghyuck removes his face from mark's neck, eyes looking puffy and red. "i love you. i love you so much, i'm in love with you. like a lot. the same way you are. a-and it'd be so amazing i-if you'd be my b-boyfriend..."

mark's head is spinning, too many thoughts running around all at once, it's almost giving him a damn headache. "mark?"

"is this a dream..."

donghyuck chuckles. "not really."

"i-i'd love to," mark musters. "god, donghyuck, i would _love_ to. i've been waiting for this for so long..."

donghyuck kisses him tenderly and mark smiles.  
  


_**< heterophobes, 9 people > ** _

**mark 11:36 AM:** ahaha

 **hyuck 11:36 AM:** ahaha

 **jeno 11:37 AM:** whats happening

 **mark 11:37 AM:** ahaha

 **hyuck 11:37 AM** : ahaha

 **jaemin 11:37 AM:** omg pleaseeee shut up

 **mark 11:38 AM** : yall want news

 **renjun 11:38 AM** : YES?!?:"6"'6'9!!!

 **mark 11:38 AM** : I HAVE A BOYFRIEND NOW <3

 **renjun 11:38 AM:** WHSTYFJSJEKFKJDKDBDB

 **yangyang 11:38 AM** : oh omgggg @hyuck do u want to come to my room ill bring u ice cream

 **hendery 11:38 AM** : and ill bring movies </3

 **hyuck 11:38 AM** : huh

 **yangyang 11:38 AM:** well mark has a bf now so :|

 **hyuck 11:39 AM:** IM THE BOYFRIEND U IDIOTS

 **yangyang 11:39 AM:** WAIT  
 **yangyang 11:40 AM** : HUH  
 **yangyang 11:40 AM** : AM I READING THIS RIGHT

 **hyuck 11:41 AM:** THATS RIGHT <3

 **mark 11:41 AM** : <3

 **xuxi 11:42 AM:** MARKDONG NATION!!!!!!

 **hyuck 11:43 AM** : no its DongMark i top

 **mark 11:43 AM:** yes u do <3

 **xiaojun 11:43 AM** : GROSSSSSSSSS  
 **xiaojun 11:43 AM** : BUT WTF CONGRATS IT WAS ABOUT TIME

 **hyuck 11:43 AM** : yeah it was  
 **hyuck 11:43 AM** : and im so so happy

 **hendery 11:44 AM:** GROSS <3 ANOTHER COUPLE IN THIS GC but im so happy for u guys u deserve it ur both annoying and madly in love with each other  
  
  
  


when donghyuck pushes him back against the bed, mark tugs at his arms, bringing their faces closer and closer until their noses touch. it's been almost two weeks since that day and mark feels like he's falling in love all over again.

mark grunts playfully when donghyuck straddles him but winds his arms around the younger's waist, anyway.

"i love you." donghyuck giggles against his lips.

mark can't help but giggle as well, feeling warmth underneath donghyuck's fingertips. "i love you too."

donghyuck kisses him like fire. a gentle, growing fire, of love and affection, adoration and everything in between.

and just like that, their promise of forever, began.  
  


**Author's Note:**

> yea this was shit :] but i just wanted some fwb mh so here we are. idk how this escalated from a simple prompt of mh casually kissing each other to a whole story but.... :+) if u made it all the way here, thank u for taking the time to read! ♡ kudos and comments are very much appreciated :]


End file.
